It’s been 6 months since my last post. I had a grandiose idea that this blog would be completed every week for the entire first year of my marriage. That’s 52 posts.
Well here we are. I’ve been married for 13.5 months and still have single digits for blog posts.
“What happened to that plan DH? Is this just another DH job? Half baked and half executed?” ….probably…. but I hope not! Look life got in my way. I had a plan and God laughed when I told it to him.
Vacations happens, I changed jobs. Alle got a promotion. Holidays, birthdays, farmers markets, day trips, just being a happy newly wed couple that never stops planning things got in the way.
Some things got put on the back burner. Challenges arose. Like the fact that I’m doing this post on my phone, in a waiting room to get my windshield replaced for the next 3 hours, as opposed to a laptop. I used to use my old work computer, and my new job doesn’t require me to have a take home laptop so phone it is.
So I’m in the spot that so many of us are in. I’m 30, with a new job, a new marriage, and my life is moving at 100mph and I’m trying to keep up.
One thing that has been put on that back burner is my personal prayer life. I go to church every Sunday, and to a prayer hour in the Eucharistic Adoration Chapel at my church every Thursday. That’s no bueno. 2/7 days in prayer is hardly a flourishing personal prayer life.
That hasn’t stopped me from trying!
This past weekend I was blessed to attend The Choice Wine marriage conference in Jacksonville. Alle and I hustled 14.5 hours in the car down and back with the one day event smashed in between. Those doing math can tell you that’s 29 hours in a car and an 8 hour conference in 3 days. I’m still alive and I’m convince Alle loves me more now.
We listened to speakers from all over such as Danielle Bean, John Pridmore, Mark and Katie Hartfiel, and founder of Paradisus Dei Steve Bollman.
They talked about marriage and the fight for the family in our culture. The need for couples to spend intimate time together in prayer. The struggle for so many that get married and expect it to work without doing the work. It was very inspirational, and I know Alle and I are committed to doing the hard work necessary to not just have a happy marriage, but a super abundant marriage.
Katie Hartfiel told an incredible story of her broken childhood home and her commitment to praying for her husband. Before she even met him her prayers for him were a direct result of his conversion on the other side of the country.
What I heard in that talk was “Pray for your spouse.” I pray for Alle every day. But honestly it’s prayers that her day goes well and that should she have challenges she get through them with a smile. This weekend reminded me I need to be praying for her soul, her desire for God, her constant daily conversion to choose the Christ path.
John Pridmore talked next. This guy is incredible. He spent time in prison, like 23 hour solitary prison, ran with some very danger gangs in London, and has been part of some serious underworld scenarios. His conversion is amazing. “I use to never go anywhere without my gun, now I don’t go anywhere without my rosary.” Check out his story
John gave his life to Christ and it showed me that it takes a serious show of will and determination to choose the Christ path every day. But even a sinner like me can be loved. Every time I fall all I have to do is take the first step and ask for forgiveness and I will always be forgiven. That’s just awe inspiring.
Two great talks about personal prayer and conversion. The need we all have to pray, but also to receive the graces of others prayers. I could feel my soul just recharging.
The next talk was given by Danielle Bean. This woman is just something else. She is a child in a family of 9 and a mother of 8 more. Her whole talk was about communication styles and when someone doesn’t communicate the way you want, that’s ok, just tell them. Her best line, “Put your stupid phones away! It is coming between you and your spouse.”
Put you phone down right now and tell your spouse you love them. I’ll wait.
We capped off the day with a practical and faith filled talk by Steve Bollman. He talked about marriage stats and gave 7 steps to a super abundant marriage.
In my life that is already going at 100 mph it seems rather annoying to try to fit one more thing in to concentrate on let alone 7. But when I do an examination of my day and realize how much of it is wasted on dumb things like Social media, video games, tv, etc I can’t really say I don’t have time.
And you can’t convince me you don’t have time either. It’s so hard for all of us to take time to put effort into something. It’s easy to sit and binge Netflix for 2 hours. It’s the same reason as to why I can say I don’t want to watch a movie because it’s too much effort, but I’ll watch three seasons of Last Man Standing in one night. Now it’s 1 am and I’m contemplating my life choices.
With so much happening I think we all need to take a step back. Examine our days. What went right, what went wrong and what can we do to improve.
With the state of politics and social issues right now, everyone has come up with a view point an opinion that is better than all the other. It’s unique and special, just like everyone else’s.
If you want to affect real change, it starts with yourself. Focus your energy and attention to bettering yourself. The whole plank in your eye before a splinter in the other train of thought.
Sant Pope John Paul the great put it perfectly. If we really want to change this world we will need a serious amount of. Godly help, but we can do it in our own homes every day. “As the family goes, so goes the nation and so goes the whole world in which we live.”
So my challenge to myself is to do a 30 pray devotional to Saint Joseph. The ultimate husband and father. If that guy can sacrifice for 30 years, I can pray for 30 days for myself, my wife, and my marriage. That’s how I’m going to affect real change in this world. How about you?
Darling Husband 